Will my schemes gang aft a-gley?

According to Robert Burns, “The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men gang aft a-gley.” In plain speakin’ he was saying “Your plans will get effed up.” I hope not, for I am planning a trip to New York with my Dear Husband and twins boys tomorrow. Here’s what we hope will happen: At 9:00 am we have a visit with the pediatrician (or, as I keep saying, the vet (thirty years of cats, you see)), then on the road to New York. It should take about 90 minutes door to door, barring accidents and other hysteria, of course. At 12:30 we are meeting a friend for lunch. This friend is a chicklet, so totally cool, totally New York hip and just so-so, but the nicest creature around. She’ll also tell it like it is, so get ready for the facts when you see her. Once she told me that a guy I was dating was all wrong for me; she had tried to engage him in small talk at a family party and she decided he had “zero personality.” She was quite right, as it turned out, so what she says is worth hearing.

My lovely New York friend has found an Indian joint for lunch, which should be quite fine, she has been to India several times, so I trust she can recognize authentic cuisine. (I had wanted to go to Aquavit , but the hostess told me, “I am so sorry, but we do not allow children under twelve in our dining room.” Excuse me? Can you say discrimination suit? So I said, “Okay, I’ll call back in eleven years.” At least the hostess had the grace to chuckle.)

When we have inhaled our lunch (DH and I) and/or flung it to the floor (the babies and I - if I don't like it - ha ha) we will be tourists and gape at the tree at Rockefeller Center. After all, the babies need to be exposed to my favorite things early, right? Then, a quick shifty at Saks to try on this hat I saw in a magazine. Then we are going uptown to the Met, where my sister, of legend and song, will be to meet us. We plan on seeing the Angel Christmas Tree in the Medieval Wing and from there I want to go to another shop, on Madison Avenue, to see another hat. Then we are going to this awesome grocery store, Fairway, in Harlem, with an actual meat locker, where they give you an overcoat to slip on in the summer it is so cold in the meat locker, and where they are rumored to have approximately 500 different kinds of olives. From Fairway we will continue north and stay overnight with my sister, and not at a hotel as originally planned, thus saving a few bucks. Which I plan on blowing on a new hat.

So – tune in, mice and men and gentle readers, to read what actually gangs a-gley.