The Penis Post

Okay, for all of y'all who may be wondering what happened with Baby A’s wiener…

On Tuesday of that week, I noticed a slight cheesy odor and saw that his intact penis was a little swollen and red. My pal, Preacher Mom, had been through this with her own intact 3 year old. They had applied a topical anti-biotic for a few days, and the redness went away. Her son also took an oral anti-biotic, because the infection was almost to the urethra, and her pediatrician felt it necessary. Her boy is A-Ok now, and has no discomfort or trouble anymore. I asked her to look at Baby A’s wiener on Wednesday, and she said, yes, it looks a little infected. So on Thursday I brought him to the pediatrician, but was not able to see his regular doctor; we saw another pedi in the group. Well, it was a traumatic visit.

The partner, who seemed okay at first, quickly lost my respect when he a) tried to retract the baby’s foreskin, and b) gave me the bogus diagnosis of phimosis. Then he said, “We have to get in there and clean out the smegma. You are going to have to have him circumcised." What?! I come from a family of doctors (Yes, my sister is a doctor!) and I know how to think for myself, so I said, “Umm, NO WAY!” I know that phimosis is a bogus diagnosis because it means a foreskin that is too tight to retract. Um, Mister Doctor? Did you doze off in the penis portion of your gross anatomy class? Little boy's foreskins generally don’t retract until they are 4, 5 or even 6 years old. Since my baby isn’t even TWO, his foreskin isn’t going anywhere for at least another two years, so how can he have a condition defined by a foreskin that retracts badly when his doesn’t retract at all? It’s like telling a 5 year old she’s having cramps because of menstruation. (And then reccomending birth control pills to manage the cramps, right?)

I was extremely upset by all this and drove home, gnashing my teeth and muttering curses. Softly though, I didn’t want to wake up my sleeping, uncircumcised baby with the infected wiener. A recommendation of circumcision, I ask you! Upon getting home, I immediately settled the baby to sleep and I went to my old pal the Internet and did a little research. I also asked my sister, who, besides having a PHD (she is super smart), and a genius IQ (no joke), also has a wonderful group of pals she met on line when she was pregnant with her first child. Now, seven years later, they all still keep in touch, several of them have blogs, like the Fab-O Amy, and they are a real wealth of information.

Over the next few days I received several informative emails from my sister’s pals that all pretty much ran along the same lines. What I found on line at the Mothering Magazine site, at Baby Center and at Caring for Kids dot com was all consistent with their advice. I’ll jot down the basics here for y’all who might need this information for your own intact son’s penises:

An uncircumcised penis is easy to keep clean and requires no special care:

Keep your baby’s penis clean by gently washing the area during his bath. Do not try to pull back the foreskin. Usually, it is not fully retractable until a boy is 3 to 5 years old, or even until after puberty. Never force it.

When your son is old enough, teach him to keep his penis clean as you’re teaching him how to keep the rest of his body clean.

When the foreskin separates, skin cells will be shed and new ones will develop to replace them. These dead skin cells will work their way down the penis through the tip of the foreskin and may look like white, cheesy lumps. These are called smegma. If you see them under the skin, you don’t need to force them out. Just wipe them away once they come out.

When the foreskin is fully retractable, teach your son to wash underneath it each day

If an uncircumcised boy has a slightly red tip to his penis, leave it alone. Don’t retract the foreskin to try and clean out the smegma (isn’t that a hilarious word!!?) it’s fine; leave it alone.

If an uncircumcised boy has a slightly swollen penis, it could be a mild infection. Apply an antibiotic cream, change his diaper often, and then; leave it alone.

Pretty plain and simple, eh? I think part of the trouble was a bit a diaper rash that wound up on his wiener instead of his tushie. So, I have switched back to the luxurious Huggies brand diaper, instead of the cheapie Big-Y brand. Huggies are much more absorbent and he didn't have any problems before we switched. Baby B must have an iron foreskin; the cheap diapers don’t bother him at all. Good thing too, because I had just bought another two cases a few days before Baby A came down with his “trouble”.

I also think he might have been irritated by some sand in his shorts. We have been going to the beach lately, and also have a sandbox at home. That would explain his frequent episodes of hands-down-pants. I know little boys like to yankies on their wankies, but he might have also been itchy from the sand. Either that or, as the natural adhesions found in a natural intact penis release, as they naturally do over time, it may cause some itchiness. Naturally.

So naturally, I must conclude that the doctor who saw him and told him to have him snipped, didn’t know what he was talking about. But, like the quasi AP mother I am, I disregarded the snap diagnosis and violent and extreme recommendation, did some research on my own and found a gentle solution to protect my baby. I also asked my village of women what to do and they knew what to say and helped me beyond measure. Naturally.