C-C-C-Challenges Part One

(An apology to my beloved David Bowie)

The past week has been the most challenging so far in my Mother of Twins career. I was somewhat accustomed to the routines of - we wake up way too early, eat waffles, go out, do something, then we drive home. Afterwards, they nap, I do something, they wake up, crying, I hold them, then we eat (waffles), then do something as a trio until the DH gets home, at which time I go to the gym, or the four of us chase each other around the house, eating waffles until it’s time for bed.

Well, it’s all changed now. Baby A now gets up even earlier than way too early, and yanks on me, yelling, “Mama! Up! Mama! UP! Mama! Up! Mama! Up!” until I comply. If I try and get a little more shuteye; it is only 5:30 after all, he gets all screechy and cross. So I do a Dolly Parton, and stumble outta bed and into the kitchen, pour myself a cup of ambition, and yawn and stretch and try to come to life…WO-rkin’ Five to Nine! What a way to make a livin’! Barely functioning, it’s all takin’ and no givin’…well, that’s not true. Baby A is big on giving me little tight-lipped kisses and big squeezy hugs. (Baby B gives me a headache.)

They are just so darn TWO! It’s bad enough that Baby A gets up at 5:45 and only naps once. What’s worse is that he likes to go to bed at 8:30, and Baby B, who has been a lot nicer these days, but still a little devil, goes to bed around 9:30 or even 10:00. It depends on whether he’s had a two or a three-hour nap, which rarely coincides with his brother’s nap. Yep - Baby A usually sleeps from 11:30 to 1:00 and Baby B can sleep from 2:00 to 4:30. So when does the MOT get to pretend she is a person in her own right, and do a little journaling instead of the teacher/caretaker/clean up fairy/laundry maid/cleaning woman/personal chef/first aid expert? The answer? Never.

Grrr. Any mother who says her children are always perfect is either lying or sedated.

Or both.

(Then one must consider my friend in Tennessee – she works part time and has her son in a day care. Must needs, and all. When she has to do something, or has an appointment, or has a major house cleaning project, the baby stays in the daycare until she is finished and can collect him. It’s not bad way of maintaining some personal time...hey, he’s already there and happy, so what’s another hour or two? She has the right idea.)

I have those three hours three days a week when they are in school. When people ask me, “What are you doing with all that free time?” I always have to stop myself from laughing. Free time, my Aunt Fanny. I drop them off at 9:00. I go grocery shopping, maybe run another errand and go home. Once home I will put away the shopping, feed the cats, sweep/mop if I must, clean the bathroom, put all the “things” in their rightful places, put in laundry/hang out the laundry, and maybe get a little walk, if I have time and it’s not raining. Then I try to answer emails, do some writing and now that I have a piano, I am going to slip in a 30-minute lesson once a week. Then I bathe (if I have a chance), eat (if I have time), and go get them from school by 11:45. It's not difficult to Get Something Done in 2 and a half hours, but it's a real challenge, and allows to time for relaxation. I used to relax at the gym with my spinning classes twice a week in the evenings, but the teacher is no longer able to teach at my old gym. I let my membership expire; if she’s not there, well, I’m not going there either!

The lack of exercise, the general, incessant demands of two two-year olds, and the feeling of the winter coming upon us have the combined effect of making me feel a bit low. However, rather than sinking back into the depression/Mean Reds of my first winter with twins, or the anxiety making cabin feverish second winter, I have made a few changes. Since I am fully aware that a common definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, I have done something different to achieve the desired different results. I bought a piano and joined a gym.

What that means is this – while they are at school, and I have “all that free time”, rather than doing a lot of little things, I am going to commit to doing one big thing twice a week - spinning classes and a workout. I will make appointments, run errands, meet friends and so on one day, and take classes the other two. I will also to go to the gym at least one weekend day, giving me more workouts than I had before. The piano purchase means I will take a lesson a week, once I find a teacher, and will practice as I can. The cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, and general housekeeping/management will just have to be done with the boys, as we used to, before they went to school.

Besides, it’s good for a toddler to help out around the house. They are old enough to put away some laundry, wash a few plastic things in the kitchen sink, put their own toys away and use a sponge and warm water to wash kitchen and bathroom surfaces. It definitely takes longer to have two little pairs of hands dipping into the housekeeping, but I want them to learn how to take care of their personal space and how to respect other people’s space too.

Let’s see how this all works out, with the work-outs and the adjusted use of my “free time”. I am not going to be feverish or Red or mean again this winter, I tell you, and I am making the changes to make that certain.

Stay tuned for more challenges - A Day from Hell is in the works...Preacher Mom, remember the vacuum cleaner attachment?